Ladies and gents, I am back on The FlyLady bandwagon. Don’t worry, I’m not crazed or judgmental towards unshiny sinks. My sink is currently full on both sides, but so much better than it was yesterday it’s not EVEN funny.

Here’s what I’ve been thinking. In a couple of years, Kevin and I plan on having a baby. It’s not in the near future, but it’s not that distant either. And can anyone remember what you were doing 5 years ago? Five years ago, I was lamenting a non-relationship with a guy who strung (strewed? strang? usheilkd? WHAT?) me along for months. (Hello, roommate and dorm friends — does anyone remember this?) If all goes as planned (and it never does, but whatever) we will have a 2-year-old in 5 years.

TIMEOUT.

Let’s stop and think about that for a minute. In a few years, we’re going to have a baby. (Sorry for all the italics. I get very “Rilla Blythe” when I think about the future and babies and AHH!) That’s insanity. How life changes so quickly. Now I’m married and it feels like I’ve always been married. Nine months down and it feels like forever. In a good way. And while I was thinking about having babies I was looking at my toes. Because toes kind of remind me of babies. They are little and cute. Well, some people’s are. And then I was looking at my tiny toe on my left foot. On the inside part of that toenail, it grows at a perfect right angle, creating a dangerously sharp point (and they don’t even need clipping right now). And because I am all hippy at heart, I’ve already started working on a birth plan (I did this like 2 years ago, it’s changed as I have). Now, I know how to make sure hospital staff doesn’t go against my wishes.

I threaten them with my razor-sharp left pinky-toenail.

Brilliant, right? I know! With feet up in the air like that I should have a clear shot at somebody’s jugular.

Then, I started thinking, which led me to ask this question of you all. Seriously. Who does that? You can’t give prisoners (the hardcore kind) nail clippers. And in a situation like mine, you definitely can’t let them go unclipped. If the need presented itself, I would use this thing as a shiv. No one would see it coming.

I’m going to have to work on that left roundhouse kick though.

Okay, back to the original topic.

That. That is a little frightening. And what I have come to realize is that if I can’t get my housekeeping under control when there are just two of us, there’s no way I’m going to know what to do when there are suddenly 3 and I’m faced with about 1000x the responsibilities that I have right now.

So, in the words of Barney Fife (who I am referencing for the 2nd time this week*), I’m nipping it in the bud.

I’ll keep you updated on my progress. Now, links!

• There’s a giveaway going on at the r house. Beautiful gift with a beautiful story behind it.
• The Bloggies are tonight! Announcing awards every 5 minutes on their Twitter.
• How to nap (thanks, Melissa!)
• Christie offers some fantastic tips on going green.
• WOLF SWEATSHIRT. I’ve always been partial to those. Found in most quality truck stops.
• I didn’t even know The Golden Driller existed (it’s because I don’t go to Tulsa. Unless I’m on my way to Branson. As a rule.), but I’m a fan now.

*The first time was in regard to the “shooting” at Oklahoma City Community College.

Apparently kids today do not know who Barney Fife is. This makes me sad.

VOTE HERE!

I put off posting this because, well, I never know what to say about it. And this year I was just floored at the nominations I received. That’s right. Plural. In years past (I’ve lost count now. Two, three?) I was nominated for the Best Writing award, which, to be honest, meant the most to me because it’s my passion. This blog is here for a reason. I’d say less for wanton exhibitionism than for my need to get things out. Kinda like what Miss Kim was talking about yesterday. I’ve been a writer (a title I learned that I could happily claim during one of my writing classes at OU) since I learned how to make the shapes of letters right before kindergarten, but I have always been an imaginer. And there is something about having the ability to imagine all kinds of scenarios that I believe is a mark of destiny. You will create. (Write, draw, paint, sculpt, dance, compose, etc.) I can’t paint, draw, or sculpt. Reading music is like math to me which means I don’t do it at all. Singing and playing the piano by ear came pretty naturally, but I’m only mediocre, if that. I have the thighs of a person who should be an accomplished dancer (meaning SHA-BAM!), but I’ve never done anything outside of lots and lots of hours of ballroom dancing and a little lyrical back in the day.

And so, I write.

This year there is no writing nomination for me and I’m cool with that. There are some people with incredible talent up for the award this year. Who I’ll be voting for, well, that’ll be a secret until it’s all over. In a minute I’ll highlight some of my favorites (and try not to leave anyone out!).

First, I want to tell you what I was nominated for this year.

Best Family Blog – I like the idea that a blog written by the female half of a newlywed couple, who was single up until very recently, is nominated for this award. Because we are a family. We’re building a home together and starting out on what will be a long journey with one another (Lord providing one of us doesn’t die or something). I’m really glad I’m documenting this life-altering change.

Now, maybe people nominated me for this one because I talk about my family. A lot. I do, I know! But I love ‘em!

…or maybe it’s because I’m really really really SFW (that’s “safe for work,” Heather ). You may think that, but I’ve got a few cousins that are more conservative than me *gasp* and they’d tell you otherwise.

Most Humorous Blog – Ha. Haha. Really? Sometimes I try. I think of a lot of funny things throughout the day and forget to write them down and then forget them entirely. This blog would be so much better if someone would give me a pocket notepad or something. Maybe I should go buy myself a tiny Moleskine.

In an effort to funny this thing up, I promise to model every prom dress and bridesmaid dress I own if I win any of these awards. Like, full runway, people. You want that? Then vote. I might even sweeten the deal and wear a prom dress to a blogger meet-up. Have you seen how good you get treated when you show up some place in formal wear? Well, I guess it’s sort of a toss-up. You’re either out for some special event or downright crazy. You never know what folks are going to assume. I’ve went through most of my childhood pretending everything was a special event and that I was the guest of honor and some may say that is crazy. I blog, you decide!

Best Political Blog (Conservative) - I don’t know about best, but conservative? Mmhmm. One thing that has become a pastime of mine is finding people who would otherwise like me, but when they find out my political affiliation they automatically assume that I’m ignorant and backwards. How tolerant of them!

Best Veteran Blogger (5+Years) - It’s true. I’ve been doing this for a really long time. If you want to get technical, I have had some kind of journal presence online since 1999. Almost my entire high school and college experience has been documented. Sometime I’ll go back and post my angsty, 15-year-old ramblings.

And (wow)…

Best Overall Blog - In the words of my husband, “That’s like ‘Best Picture’, right?” I told him it was, but then explained that I’m like your random independent documentary with conservative overtones that gets nominated up against sweeping epics with lots of dinner parties featuring spectacular shots of food (The Pioneer Woman) and period drama starring Daniel Day-Lewis, dressed the way men always should be–in top hat and tails (The Art of Manliness). I don’t hold out a lot of hope for this award, but I am humbled that enough of you would nominate me for it to land me on the ballot.

These awards make me question what keeps me blogging every year. Not in a “why don’t I just quit this” kind of way. But, I mean, it makes me realize why I do. I was blogging about Oklahoma long before I’d met anyone else who was. These awards have provided a wonderful way for us to get connected with other blogs we may have never heard about otherwise. I look forward to them each year with the hope that I’ll find another gem that pulls me in to read everyday.

Thank you all so much for nominating. I have been so blessed and encouraged by your sweet compliments and hope that you find the same blessing and encouragement here from time to time (when I’m not getting snarky [The Newest Innovation in Stool Softeners] or documenting a desperate addiction to tacos [When we get behind closed doors...])

The deadline to vote is MIDNIGHT this Sunday, February 14. Oklahoma bloggers, take a minute to show some love and cast a vote for your favorites!

Later, I will be posting a tribute to my favorite nominees. Stay tuned!

It was a long weekend. And not the good kind either. Today was a long, crazy day and I’m hoping the rest of the week shapes up pretty quickly because I’m in no mood to deal with stragglers. Plus, I have a trip to Virginia Beach to look forward to, Lord willing. It is looking like we may get some nasty ice around here. Nothing like me and Kevin deciding to visit family back east to put mother nature in the mood for a good freeze. Thanks a lot, lady.

On with the show…

• Allow me to complain for a moment without giving you all the satisfaction of a related link. Ahem. Why can’t I escape The Besters? And The Worsters? And the “How Did You Pay For That?!”…-ers? It seems that whatever place I am in life there is always someone around me like this. Have something wonderful happen? Don’t worry, something better happened to them. Once. It doesn’t matter when or if it’s relevent, it happened. Tragedy strike? Don’t look to them for sympathy. They lost their mom and their best dog on the same day. And heaven forbid you show them vacation photos. Sheesh. “Well, I don’t ever have the time to go somewhere that far away.” or “Who did you get to help pay for that?” or maybe they’ll tell you about that one vacation 10 years ago that was easily triple the price of whatever you did.*tap*

  *taptaptap*

  Anyone listening? You ready?

  Get some self-esteem. It is a sad, sad situation if you have to belittle others at every turn to make yourself feel better. I’m sorry for whatever happened in your past to make you behave in such a way now. But you need to grow up and stop.

  Good grief.

• Oh, hi
• Coffee makes you dance around like a goat! (educational AND fun!)
• The Spohrs have their beautiful Annie. Blessings on you all.
• smitten kitchen has this divine sounding Mixed Citrus Salad w/ Feta & Mint. Yum.
• As you may know, about 6 months ago I stumbled upon the blog of my cousin, Misti. Through her I’ve learned of my cousin, her brother, Curtis, his wife Stephanie, and their little girl, Zoe. Not long ago Curtis announced that they were expecting on his blog. Last week, the baby was delivered at 26 weeks. This little girl and her family have all been in my prayers and I hope they’ll be in yours, too. Welcome to the world, Miss Ashleigh.
• Food Network Humor is my new favorite blog. Oh my. And this — Amazon Product Recommendations: Ina Garten Edition

Have a great week, y’all!

So there’s not going to be any image, however cute, inviting my readers to “show us [their] privates.” Public flashing is no joke people. NO. JOKE.

But yeah…Happy Delurker Day!

I know you’re out there. I can see you. But I don’t know your name. Or what brings you here. Why you stay. What it is that draws you back in every, single day. (Eastern Europe, I’m talkin’ to you)

Tell me your name. How you found me. What you like and what you could do without. Go ahead, caller. I’m listening.

Guhhhh.

That’s the noise my sinuses are making. It’s better than the screaming. So glad the screaming has stopped.

Some links for you:

• FACT: Middle Schoolers Stink
• The Biblical Qualifications of the Teaching Office in the Church OR Why churches are going to hell in a handbasket expecting lay people to do all the deep, theological teaching.
• Melissa is ditchin’ the fiction in favor of the non-. I, too, have a shelf of non-fiction that I need to get to work on…
• The Friar reviews Sherlock Holmes and I remain confident in my decision not to see it. Basil Rathbone you are not, Mr. Downey.
• Mmm. Just what we need in Oklahoma right now — Four Warm and Cozy Soups from The Pioneer Woman.
• The 2009 Okie Blog Awards are calling for nominations!
• Rare in utero images of animals — This stuff fascinates me.
• Speaking of soups — PICKLE SOUP! Oh my goodness, I hope you know that pickles have been one of my favorite foods since I was a wee little thing. I’m trying this. Pronto.
• Oh, in case you missed it, we’re now subservient to INTERPOL. Faaaab.
• Kim counted down her top 10 movies of the decade. Some good ones in there and some I still need to see.
• Signs that you shouldn’t be awake. Sounds a lot like my college experience.

Have a great week, y’all. I’m grabbing the teapot I received from a coworker (who hated me) and refashioned into a neti pot.

I once knew someone who liked to talk about her life a lot. It was interesting, because her life was crazy. She would tell me things that I would never dream of telling another person, but I was a captive audience and really had no choice. What this woman did was very different though. It took me a little while to figure it out, but she would bait you with her life. Give you just enough to make any normal person ask, “And then what?” She wanted people to be interested and ask her about things. It made her feel important and needed and I know now that those were things she was desperate for.

But, like I said, it took me a while to figure this all out. Along with her need to share she had a need to know. Just as much as she could. Because (never forget it) knowledge is power. Or can be if you know how to wield it. (However, knowledge does NOT = wisdom. I think that’s important to note.) She was a keen manipulator and almost brilliant at what she was doing. Or maybe I just keep telling myself that because I fell into her trap and couldn’t pull myself out for months. Either way, she managed to manipulate me into sharing just enough of my life with her that she began playing all kinds of mind games. Asking backhanded questions to try and make me doubt myself and my decisions. I will admit that I gave her too much to work with. In the beginning of our working relationship I imagined that I would be making a new “work friend.” You know, the kind that you wouldn’t necessarily hang out with outside of work, but that you can be nice and friendly with from 8 to 5. I’ve had plenty of those. Some of them turned into great outside-of-work friendships. Not all, and I wasn’t expecting it with this person. It was easy to see from the start that her life was too chaotic (and sometimes dangerous) to invite into my own, but you’d better believe that she tried. Over and over to edge her way in. Hinting at being invited over. Asking me if I had any plans on a certain day before telling me why she wanted to know.

Her behavior became more and more erratic, to the point that I dreaded going to work every day. One day in February my nervous system decided it had had enough. I had a full-blown panic attack at work. It was awful. The most frightening thing that has ever happened to me. And when the people I was close to found out what had happened that day, they all had the same reaction — it was her. It was no secret that she’d been driving me crazy for months at this point, but I had been trying to keep quiet and not let things get to me. I never went to a supervisor about this person when I should have. Because the behavior she exhibited was inappropriate for a place of business at the very least. And some of it was downright insane.

To this day, I am pretty certain that she believes I am the reason she lost her job. She never asked me and I have not spoken to her since that day, but if she had asked I would be able to tell her that I had nothing to do with it. It was surprising, actually. I had reached the point where I thought I might have to quit my job to preserve my nerves (I was getting married in 4 months and the work situation was only making things worse). I was glad it didn’t come to that. Though I don’t feel like it’s appropriate to talk about the details surrounding what happened then, what I can tell you is that it wasn’t me. And for that I was so grateful.

Still, that didn’t stop her from blogging that she would “have the last laugh.” I’m not sure if it’s connected, but I would not be surprised…a few days after that blog post went up, my car and house were egged at close range. We took pictures and after discussing it with my dad (whose first reaction was to think that it was her) called the police. Points to note: 1) No one else in the neighborhood was vandalized, 2) It was done with some pretty extreme stealth (I wake at the smallest sound), 3) The person was at very close range, 4) The eggs that hit the house were thrown from the small area between the front of my car at the garage door. The police officer told us that it did not look like the work of kids because of all those reasons. It wasn’t done from a car. Someone got out of their car (in all likelihood, parked away from the  house and walked up to our yard), walked into our yard and within a few feet of my car, and started pelting.

The first thing she asked was if there was anyone who was angry at me. I immediately told her about the former co-worker and what I had seen on her blog. She instructed me to print that off and keep it, then to watch and see if she ever posted anything else about it. Something about those two things being bookends around what had happened — one a threatening message and, if it ever followed, a post indicating she had exacted her revenge. After that, it would be up to her to prove that she hadn’t done it. I had no idea it would work that way. The officer asked for her name, description, address…all that jazz. And I gave her what I knew. It’s on record. There’s a police report. I was not going to lie down and let this person, whoever did it, walk all over me.

Maybe she’s reading this. I don’t know. I had most of the IP addresses she had visited my blog from flagged and I should know whenever she comes by. But I’m pretty sure now that she is using her phone to access it, which is ridiculously troublesome to try to figure out. Maybe this wasn’t the wisest thing to post. It could cause me more problems. I guess we’ll see.

And maybe you don’t see how this relates to oversharing on blogs. Let me explain. This experience taught me everything I know about oversharing and its dangers. I shared more with an unstable individual than I ever should have. I should have known better. The whole experience brought light to what I had heard people complain about others doing on their blogs. The point is that you don’t know who you are giving the information to. You don’t know what they are capable of doing with it. You don’t know what their intentions are or how something you may view as an innocent aspect of your life or personality can fuel their insanity. You don’t know what it can spark in them. What you have to decide for yourself is how much is too much? What parts of your life are you willing to turn over to the wolfpack? What we do as bloggers is serve up our lives, opinions, sometimes even our families (bad move) for dinner. You can dish it up however you please, make it pretty with pictures and flowery language, contests and prizes and all kinds of table decorations like that. But the truth of the matter is that it’s a free-for-all. You aren’t sending out personal invitations to your dinner party. You’re opening up the front door and yelling, “Come on in!”

Part 2 coming soon.

Remember last year when I started my 200 Year Reading Challenge? It’s still going and I’ve actually made some headway! Thanks to Emily for reminding me to update it.

Here’s the deal though. I still need some suggestions! This thing is growing by the year (I decided to extend it to the “present,” whatever the present may be at the time) and I would love to know the books you all think are must reads.

I have updated the list, but there are TONS of empty places. So if you wouldn’t mind, mosey on over there and tell me what to read!

Today I am participating in Bethany’s Read. Read. Readathon. You can find out more here. Not too late to jump in!

It’s 11:31 and I’m starting off with Sarum. Maybe I’ll finish it today? We’ll see.

12:31 pm – I do not recommend reading books with tiny print for a readathon. It makes your reading totals look dismal. Taking a quick break for some laundry and to grab some lunch.

2:12 pm – Sarum was just not holding my attention for any length of time and the 8pt font wasn’t helping either. So I started a new book. No Country For Old Men. It’s been in my “to read” pile for a while and now I’m going after it. LOVE. IT. Fast paced and such great writing.

6:20 pm – So…I took a nap. Back to reading though! I’ve knocked out 110 pages of No Country For Old Men. Can’t wait to see the movie now.

7:28 pm – Reading in the bathtub. It’s the way to go. Oh, and I had some chocolate Malt-o-Meal earlier. I love that stuff. It’s like hot chocolate in a bowl. That you eat.

10:40 pm – I am turning in for the night. It’s been so much fun meeting and interacting with all the bloggers participating today. There are so many blogs I have added to my feed reader today and I just can’t wait to do this again! Goodnight, all!

Time spent reading: 260 mins
Total pages: 240 pages

Taking part in I Heart Monster’s Breaktime Shindig. I typed “Sindig” on accident, but fixed it. That’s a totally different thing.

1. Lose Your Cred – I love the colors she uses on her blog! They make my heart smile. What a bright, cheery place.
2. This Bookshelves of Doom lady? Hilarious. I mean, you can kinda gather that from the header. But yeah, I think she’s really funny.
3. Okay, Emily says that we don’t have to take her too seriously, but there is just something about the header at Seriously Reading that makes me feel like I should. I’m loving the header. The red is so striking against the black and white. Hey, Emily? I don’t have anyone to talk books with either. Glad we both have outlets for that!
4. tuulenhaiven has some awfully serene colors going on over at her blog. I love it.
5. Brown Girl has got some clean lines going on and I LOVE clean lines. A sucker for them even.

I have been wondering how other people go into readathons. So far I have only taken part in one official readathon with a group and then one by myself, but when I see other people gearing up for a weekend of reading most of them take a pile of books in. Me, well, I have brought in an average of 3 pretty long novels to either finish or read from start to finish that day.

Maybe it’s because I can’t get into more than 2 or 3 books at one time. I used to, but nowadays I start getting them really mixed up.

And the snacks. What do you snack on? I haven’t found anything that’s been a good standby to have on hand. I try not to eat a lot of carbs and that can be difficult when it comes to quick snacks.

Drinks. What do you drink? I’ve been started the day off with my normal 1-2 cups of coffee, followed by a variety of herbal tea throughout the day, and water. Occasionally I’ll change it up a little with a Diet Dr. Pepper. I know that’s Ronnica approved.

So, how do you approach a readathon?

Truth is that I need to coffee more on Monday than Sunday, anyway. This weekend (ever since I bought that box of candy canes) I’ve been enjoying peppermint mochas. Mmm.

• Mountain Rose Herbs lists “50 Ways You Can Spice Up Your Life” – some great tips here on herbal baths, remedies, tea, etc.
• They also have a number of recipes for relaxing winter baths. I must try these.
• Been reading my series of posts covering our honeymoon? No? Get caught up: Day 2 – Pt. 1, Day 2 – Pt. 2, Day 3, Day 4 – Pt. 1, and Day 4 – Pt. 2.
• Christopher Walken covers Lady GaGa – Oh, the hilarity.
• This is an instance where a Google ad really worked. All I’m going to say is BACONNAISE.
• Another group of Compassion bloggers are headed to El Salvador. Shannon reminds us to keep them in our prayers.
• Ronnica is in Turkey! Go check out her blog as she posts about her experiences there. Personally, I’m hoping for more food photos.

Short week at work, but likely a busy one with all we have going on. Best thing? The week ends with my birthday. I should probably come up with a list of things that I’d like to have. One of our good friends (the minister who married us) has a running list that he updates. And it’s LONG. Perhaps I should do that?